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Sunday, June 28, 2009

The Grim Reaper of Infomercials Wears a Snuggie

R.I.P.
Billy Mays
TV Pitchman
July 20, 1958 - June 28, 2009

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Bad

R.I.P.
Michael Jackson
Musician, Actor, King of Pop
August 29, 1958 - June 25, 2009Thriller!

Jason and Jenni, so timely, so filled with class.

Jason: we blew it not going to the michael jackson auction
Jenni: um, ok. i still feel good about not going. being mocked on tour sad-ass blog would probably have driven him to a slightly earlier grave.
Jason: maybe they can actually auction off his stuff now
Jenni: they might have to, no?
Jenni: wuzzent he broke-ass-broke and that's why he was doing those concerts in london next month?
Jenni: which they'll have to refund the money for, i'd say
Jason: but his nose will live on
Jenni: sucks to be blanket right about now
Jason: yeah or bubbles
Jason: or corey feldman, but that's always been the case
Jenni: surely bubbles preceded his master to the pearly gates, and i'm pretty sure corey feldman preceded bubbles to the pearly necklace
Jason: who will now succeed the throne of pop?
Jenni: I believe a cage-match style throwdown will decide
Jenni: that's how michael got the throne, and also why prince walks with a limp
Jason: oh, shum on
Jason: all hail justin timberlake, new king of pop
Jenni: yeah he's in shape and shit
Jenni: are people in your office also playing michael jackson music
Jenni: because yay
Jason: no, i still have the charlie's angels theme on repeat
Jenni: classy
Jason: he's touched so many of us. when we were children. gentle, loving caresses.
Jason: so you seeing all these rumors about jeff goldblum being dead, too?
Jenni: saw someone mention it
Jenni:also hearing and seeing that comes in threes thing which totally bugs me
Jason: yeah, when do you start and stop counting?
Jason: cuz david carradine was kinda out there on his own
Jenni: but people say it like it's this fact
Jenni: right
Jenni: i hate it
Jason: it's hazardous out there right now if you're a celebrity. now's not a good time to be fiddling around with auto-erotic asphyxiation
Jenni: and i really hate it when people are like "did you ever notice..." like they thought of it
Jenni: which is like, at least triple stupid
Jason: he's up there now with jesus and his juice
Jenni:Dirty Diana? Really? You are not honoring anyone's legacy if you play a piece of shit song like that.
Jenni: Jesus co-workers, get some sense. i just told my co-worker i was going to go "king of pop a cap in their asses" for playing Michael Jackson music so loudly during work
Jenni: not one thing from Off the Wall, either
Jason: at least Extra and The Insider won't hafta keep milking this ed mcmahon stuff
Jenni: yeah tho I am sort of excited to see what Webster and Macaulay Culkin have to say about it. and just random celebs who happened to be out and about. i love when they don't know and the tv shows ambush them
Jason: i just turned on the news
Jason: sheesh
Jason:it's like 9/11
Jason: poor farrah
Jenni: Wouldn't it be fucked up if MJ gave Farrah HPV and died of remorse?
Jenni: sorta funny: http://www.flickr.com/photos/zdarsky/3661318582/
Jason: zomg

R.I.P. Farrah Fawcett

Actress, Poster Babe
February 2, 1947 - June 25, 2009