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Monday, December 31, 2007

2007 in Review

There are mere hours before we have to retire our Hilary Duff calendar for the year, so it's a good time for me to blog poetic on 2007's best and worst...

Best Comedies of 2007
Pregnancy movies: Knocked Up and Juno, though I actually consider pregnancy movies to be of the horror genre.

Best Semi Truck vs. Fighter Jet Scene in a Movie
Live Free or Die Hard. Strangely enough, it wasn't any scene in Transformers.

Worst Timing Award
  • The release of Things We Lost in the Fire just before the California wildfires began
  • Lynn Spears trying to publish her book on parenting

Guilty-Pleasure Pop CDs of the Year
  • Dignity by Hilary Duff
  • We Are the Pipettes by The Pipettes
  • Headstrong by Ashley Tisdale
    (But NOT the new album by her fellow High School Musical costar Vanessa Hudgens. Well... I'm not a fan of V-Hud's music album, at least. Her personal photo album, though, is an altogether separate matter.)
Restaurant Jingle of the Year
The Outback Steakhouse song ("Let's go Outback tonight...")
I can't get that damn song outta my head. It's based on "Wraith Pinned to the Mist and Other Games" by Of Montreal, but I actually like the digeridoo'd up version better.

Worst Restaurant Name
I thought this was a symptom of a really bad yeast infection, but I guess it's just a poorly named Italian joint. But did they really need to use a triangle of spaghetti as their logo?

Other restaurant names to avoid: anything ending in "-esticles," "-lamydia" or "-airy nutsack." Also anything rhyming with "Schmapplebee's."

Best Pregnancies
5. Halle Berry
4. Jennifer Lopez
3. Christina Aguilera
2. Jessica Alba
1. Jamie Lynn Spears

Jessica Alba would've topped the charts if I had posted this in early December, but I ended up waiting. Meanwhile, Jamie Lynn Spears didn't end up waiting. Good thing for this list.

Top Celebrity Jail Sentences
5. Michelle Rodriguez
4. Keifer Sutherland
3. Lindsay Lohan
2. Nicole Richie
1. Paris Hilton

Paris wins for the blazing the trail and serving all the extra days that her other debutards didn't. Turns out that Lindsay's 84-minute jail term was longer than her movie I Know Who Killed Me lasted in theaters. I guess "overcrowding" wasn't the case in those theaters.

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