Nerds Descend Upon Comic-Con Day 1, Parents' Basements Vacated Nationwide

San Diego - I'm reporting from the floor on the first day of Comic-Con 2008, also known as a mass gathering of the world's fattest Jedis and sweatiest Muggles. This is actually the first time I've attended the convention solo, so I have no one to run interference for me when the she-nerds start undressing me with their eyes and then promptly begin redressing me as Doctor Who. Tell my story if I don't return alive after this weekend.

Anyway, here's a gallery of some of the cool toys and sights I photographed on Day 1 of the geek-a-palooza.

Real-life Uglydolls. Strangely, they were probably two of the most attractive attendees at the show.

I take that back -- Autumn Reeser (The OC) was probably one of the more attractive attendees at the show. She was there promoting her new straight-to-DVD film, Lost Boys: The Tribe.

Galactus Mighty Mugg. In stores this November.

More new Mighty Muggs: Thor, Punisher and The Raiders of the Lost Ark fertility idol, which is available exclusively at the convention.

A sterling silver My Little Pony to commemorate the toy line's 25th anniversary. I think this thing poops out nickels.

Top things overheard at Comic-Con Day 1:

1. "We have 'No Vowels Day,' where we text each other without using vowels. It's hilarious!"
Hilarious? It sounds fckng stpd.

2. Nerd #1 to Nerd #2 with the handlebar mustache: "I enjoy your mustache."
What do you do, Mustache Nerd? Tie damsels up to railroad tracks? What I'd really enjoy is your absence, geek.

I totally had to fork over my man-cred to photograph this, but Jenni loves these Tonner dolls. This one is Phantom Zone Supergirl.

Poison Ivy and Aquaman Tonner dolls.

Lara Croft Tonner doll.

The many flavors of Darth Vader, part 1:
Sherbet

The many flavors of Darth Vader, part 2:
DJ Sith

Some people dressed up as Star Wars LEGO figures.

Kevin Smith is fat.

Check back here tomorrow for Comic-Con news...