First up, there's the story of a prison inmate in Pakistan who had a light bulb removed from his ass. The lonely prisoner claims that inmates or the police drugged him and then bulb-assaulted him while he was zonked out, but the doctors strongly doubt it. Chances are, the inmate needed some companionship where the sun don't shine and a light bulb went off in his head. Said light bulb was then likely seized by the inmate and promptly plugged into his exit-only socket. Someone should print up posters and t-shirts of the X-ray with the slogan, "Bad Idea."
Light bulb, right-side up, above your head = Good idea.
Light bulb, upside-down, in your ass = Bad idea.
That's the last time I let a light bulb buy me dinner!The second story tells of a former Oklahoma judge who was found guilty on four counts of indecent exposure because he was... wait for it... using a penis pump in his courtroom. One of the judge's female court reporters testified that his little gavel was disrobed on 15 occasions, and her attention was drawn to his Exhibit A only after she heard the "sh-sh" sounds of what turned out to be his penis pump, or, in legalese, what's known as the "judge's chamber." Gives new meaning to the term "all rise."
1 comment:
The judge "allegedly" shaved himself in court, too. See:
http://www.newsnet5.com/home-backup/9451228/detail.html?treets=nn5&tid=265532923813&tml=nn5_12pm&tmi=nn5_12pm_1_11000806302006&ts=H
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