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Thursday, June 22, 2006

Job Opening!

If you're like me, you like videogames. They're like, fun and stuff. But very, very soon Electronic Arts, the largest videogame publisher in the world (most widely known for its EA Sports franchises like the Madden Football games), decided to mess with that tried and true formula. What if a videogame wasn't fun? Brilliant!

Enter NFL Head Coach. It takes a traditional football videogame and eliminates all of that boring old filler like controlling players and doing fun things and replaces them with things like managing whiny assistants, haggling with greedy agents and yes, interviewing for jobs. That's right, the first thing you do in the game is interview for your Head Coaching job so you, y'know, can PLAY THE REST OF THE GAME!

Can you imagine? Hopeful videogame applicants visit a job fair to get a gig in the biz.


I don't know about you, but I play games to forget about work. I don't need a game that simulates in excruciating detail one of the most stressful jobs out there. I don't want to sweat through a virtual job interview, then have to interview and hire myriad underlings, then have to answer to some virtual dick of a virtual boss. That's enough to make me virtually blow my virtual brains out, and I haven't even really covered how the game makes you console every player and coordinator and agent any time you disagree with their boneheaded ideas. So if one of your staff suggests that you draft five kickers and you opt to not follow his stupid advice, he's going to throw a tantrum and threaten to quit. Awesome.

"Well, Mr. Man, my business partner and I have over 40 years of combined experience in a number of videogame genres--fighting, platform, adventure, racing, even a little RPG and puzzle work."


So, uh, I know that I've got the game over in my June videogame picks, but maybe you should only check it out if you're like one of those crazy fantasy football junkies. Or you like having an ulcer.

Check out some opinions on the final game for more of what I'm talkin' 'bout:

1up.com; GameSpot

Jenni took the pictures for me. Wasn't that totally bitchin' of her?

1 comment:

Deitri said...

"Mr. Man." Ah, ha ha ha!